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Oh well, as it's Valentines day I'll leave it up to you Whatsoever you decide I can deal with, no fearing Providing it doesn't involve wet fish Or bedroom chandelier ing Jon Bratton © 2004© The following is by far the most popular thing I've written if the number of times it's been copied is anything to go by I'd like to scuttle your puttle Spiddle your paddle Tickle your wickle And twittle your taddle Stroodle your doodle Cromple your string Brundle your strundle And frondle your ding See, I told you I'm completely nuts about you Jon Bratton © 2004© From Humorous Love Poems Page This is a love poem What I have written Cos with all consuming love I've been smitten And when I say smitten I mean everywhere There's one bit, particularly smit But let's not go down there Part of Long Poem © Jon Bratton 2007© Funny Sexy Poems From Funny Sexy Limericks Page Wear nothing, not even your bikini I’ve spilled some gin on my weenie.I thought this uncouth, So I’ve added vermouth, How’d you like me to slip you a martini?As a trailer, here's examples of what can be found elsewhere From Husband Birthday Verses Page I love you oh so very much Totally, completely From the very top of my head To the bottom of my feetly And another part really loves you If you know what I mean!It’s a place.head nor feet But directly in between Jon Bratton 2007© Funny Sexy Poems From Valentine Verses Page I'd give up Jim Beam and Jack Daniels And swear a No Smoking oath I'd take exercise and use weights To encourage (penal)(bosom) growth I'd improve my grooming habits And discover wonderful places to dine I'd go to IKEA to improve my wardrobe If you'd be my Valentine A refusal will cause my enlistment In the French Foreign Legion I'd shun all connubial pleasures By padlocking my nether region I'd shun all mind enhancing drugs Oh yes, even beer and wine Don't feel any pressure, my darling But please be my Valentine Jon Bratton © 2011 ©What can I give you that's special That doesn't cost a sou?Just wanted to remind you, what is impossible for us is still possible for God!I’m lifting you up in prayer; may you be strengthened and encouraged.I'm getting very woozy And the machine has mashed me chest This machine was created by a man, Of this, I have no doubt.I'd like to stick his pair down there, in there, And see how they come out.© Women Lib!
Let them know you wish them the best and that you are there for them with this important message with a lighthouse on the rocks next to the sea.
Sometimes a friend or family member really needs a little encouragement from you. I was able to customize it on the front cover as well as the inside.
Whatever challenge they're facing - work related, religious, a health concern like cancer - let them know you're behind them 100% and send your support with an Encouragement card. I also liked the fact that the card was sent to me the next day and it arrived super quick.” “I have found the cards on this site to be of good quality.
The magnolia print is from one of my original oil paintings.
Many of my cards have a theme of encouragement - probably the result of so many years in social work - but this message really seems to resonate with a lot of people. I know sometimes it’s hard to keep going, and doubts creep in.
© Jon Bratton 2004 Adapted from a limerick© That's the end of the heads up.